“Force creates fear. Fear destroys trust. Trust is the basis of harmony.”

I’ve been reflecting on these words for the past couple of days, spoken by the Dalai Lama in an interview on SBS Dateline earlier this week.

On observation it’s fairly easy to recognise this force in others and in the outside world, and to see why the world is not a harmonious place these days. On a personal level, I can feel clearly when someone tries to force their belief onto me, or when I am forced to participate in a conversation I do not want to have. From my past I can see clearly now how lines of trust were broken because of the force inflicted, and why there is no harmony with those human connections and how that lack of harmony radiates out to others.

On a global scale, it’s obvious to see the forceful destruction of lives and our surroundings. With both personal and global experiences of force the heart aches, and the mind ‘tut tuts’ and silently demands, “why can’t you see that you are destroying trust, that you are making it impossible for harmony?”

After listening to these words by the Dalai Lama, I began to reflect on the feeling of force within myself.  Over the past few days, I’m suddenly more aware of this feeling – when I force myself to work harder, ignoring my body’s signs that I’m very tired and need to rest… when I force my parenting beliefs in our household at a time when we need to let go and just be in the moment with our two-year old’s will… when I force myself to be social even though my heart, body and mind says “hibernate”… when I give more than I have…

By carrying this learned force within me throughout my life,  I can see that every time I force myself to do something or be something or have something at a time when it’s simply not necessary, I am feeding the fear within me, destroying my self-trust, and therefore not living harmoniously.

It suddenly makes so much sense.

Do you recognise when you are forcing yourself to do or be something other than who you are? For me it’s been so ingrained, such a part of me that it seemed impossible to separate. And I’m sure if I don’t retain the awareness, it will slip through the cracks, and be stitched into the seams of me again.

I had no intention of writing this post, I have a list of ‘important things’ to do, but something that resembles a flow of sorts, made me aware this was the most important thing to do – to share –  in this moment.  And in this very moment,  I can feel the pull of force to take me away from it. I recognise it. But right now, I let it be.

Have a beautiful weekend, mes amis.

xx

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“When I was four years old they tried to test my IQ, they showed me this picture of three oranges and a pear.  They asked me which one is different and does not belong, they taught me different was wrong.”

Ani Difranco

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Thanks bob.

Also if you are going to do one inspiring thing today (beside hanging out here in the (blog)house with me of course) I suggest you do this: take a wander through amanda’s flickr favourites. You are bound to find some kind of wonderful in there that will knock your socks off. It’s where I found the above beauty from  sara + h . Enjoy.

Oh yes, I have another post coming up today.  This next one will surely have you singing your way through the day.

“It is my belief that whereas the twentieth century has been a century of war and untold suffering, the twenty-first century should be one of peace and dialogue. As the continued advances in information technology make our world a truly global village, I believe there will come a time when war and armed conflict will be considered an outdated and obsolete method of settling differences among nations and communities.”

His Holiness the Dalai Lama

thanks bob, this quote just might be my favourite thus far.

i found this gorgeous wooden postcard at kitsch kitchen the other day and had to have it, it now sits above my desk and ever since i bought it, the sun has been shining bright!

“On voit la paille dans l’oeil de son voisin, mais pas la poutre dans le sien.”

image by Petrina Tinslay, from the f8 photo library

Which means? This:
“One sees the straw in the eye of its neighbour but not the beam in his own.”

Think long and hard about this. Loooooong and haaaard. (I hope you are getting my humour in my writing – it sometimes gets mistaken as offensive but that doesn’t seem to stop me).

I know I was going to try to do a pronunucation version for you so you could show off your French at the next dinner party, but this proverb is long and if you are anything like me, you’d be lucky to remember it let alone pronounce it correctly. But I do realise not everyone has the memory of a goldfish comme moi, so you Frenchies out there (yes that is you Mary-Laure), if you felt like adding a phonetical version of this proverb we would all be very appreciative!

And to copy-cat Bob Sherman, I’m adding one he sent to me in his Daily Dose yesterday, this one’s from Marky Mark (Twain, not the Funky Bunch)…

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

This quote I should have tattooed on my forehead so that every time I look in the mirror I can kick myself for forgetting it, then perhaps I’d finally abide by it. Enough metaphors and innuendos, onto our interior fix for the day!