portrait photograph by my awesome assistant, Julia Gordon
On Monday I was on a shoot for Country Style magazine, creating tabletop shots with my assistant Julia, and photographer Craig Wall for my upcoming magazine columns. It was a full day shoot – the first full day, 10 hour long shoot I have been on since being pregnant with Laly. It was the first time I’d been away from her for more than 5 hours. In the morning, in the hours before I left, my heart began to hurt. While driving to the studio in Alexandria with a car chock-a-block full of props, I told myself to ‘just get over it’. But the ache remained for the day although I did have fun playing with props and making things with Julia.
We finished shooting at 6pm, I think I’ve never packed my car so quickly. I gave Julia the fastest thanks-for-everything hug and backed out of the loading dock as fast as legally possible. I got home just in time to be able to give Laly her last feed of the day. We sat quietly in her room, curtains drawn, and just gazed into each others eyes as she fed.
It’s been a rough week since then. I know she’s picking up on my stress to meet story deadlines and book deadlines. I strive to find the balance.
xx
PS Thank you so much for your ongoing support with raising funds to help self-publish Little Treasures: Made by Hand. We’ve had some technical issues with pozible while they upgraded their website, and we are so thankful for your patience in pledging and signing in. If you have any queries AT ALL, do not hesitate to contact me by email (click here), and either myself or Fran will get back to you pronto.
PPS It’s my 35th birthday tomorrow. I have nothing planned, should I? Ideas?
Happy birthday, Australia Day & everything. Ideas, after i became a mother, i just loved parties at home with my family. This is so interesting. I just posted on motherhood & working, especially being self employed & working from home with your children around you. I’ve done the lot – working full time outside the home & expressing milk (for one baby), working from home (with 4 babies) & now, as my eldest commences year 9, the two years i’ve taken backing away from my successful home based studio work, has been fantastic, 12 years of extremely interesting collaborations & connections. It possible to do both, or combinations, i had twins in the middle, that was my jolt out of the workforce to put my hobby into small business, now i’ve come full circle & as my youngest is now 9, i’m enjoying a very different stage in my life. Good luck to you & i look forward to the Country Style work, my best friend renews my subscription every year, it will soon be my 38th birthday & that’s her gift!! Love Posie
January 25th, 2013 | #
Hi Pia, so great your back doing what you love though. Creativity = happy mum. Happy Birthday for tomorrow. I’ll be 43 on the 27th. I’m looking forward to family time and maybe dinner out. Enjoy your special day. Prux
January 25th, 2013 | #
Ideas for your 35th birthday tomorrow? RELAX and ENJOY!!
January 25th, 2013 | #
Dearest Pia, the greatest gift you can give yourself is a day off from working, stress and deadlines, and spend it with the ones you love most of all. One day will not hurt and we can all spread the word about your lovely up and coming book, to help fund raise. That can be our gift to you. Enjoy time out, enjoy your birthday x x x
January 25th, 2013 | #
It is an ongoing journey finding balance! Wishing you and your little lady gentle days together. As for your birthday…. a delicious and slow brunch somewhere heavenly and pottering amongst lovely things with your beloveds perhaps. Or is that my ideal birthday ;)? Hope your day is grand x
January 25th, 2013 | #
Hi Pia, Happy 35th birthday for tomorrow. You should do something that you love with the 2 loves of your life; your man and your beautiful little princess. From one creative mum to another, all the best for a wonderful birthday. Kind regards, Heather
January 25th, 2013 | #
Happy birthday, dear Pia!! Enjoy your day, whatever you’re planning to do.
I think, you’re doing well with balancing job and being a mother. 5 hours are quite some time for the little ones (and for the mothers). I experienced the same feeling (and it was only one hour!) and ended up with giving up on my job for the first 7 years. So, you see, you both have done it well. Just listen to your heart and of course Laly and you’re on the right track.
Wishing you all the best! xo
January 25th, 2013 | #
balance is tricky!! and that feeling the first ‘proper’ time you leave your babe is so hard, heart breaking. happy birthday… enjoy time wiyh your two loves xx
January 26th, 2013 | #
It will be a constant juggle but one I think you’ll come to take pride in and I know you will find ways to juggle it well. There will be days when balls are dropped but honestly, how else will that little one learn that life is about dropping the ball sometimes if she doesn’t see her mama do it? You will be wonderful. And if not wonderful, you will just be – and that’s OK too.
January 26th, 2013 | #
As a working artist, I raised my 2 wonderful boys, and balance was difficult.They became my inspiration. They spent many hours in the studio, yet, they were alway the Priority. Now, my first grand baby is in my care 3 days a week. He loves the studio and is a new joyful source of inspiration?
Happy Birthday Pia. Job well done!
January 26th, 2013 | #
Hey there sweet one… I couldn’t resist and I’ve nominated you for a Beautiful Blogger Award (or Very Inspiring Blogger Award). Tis your choice to accept the award or not. To find out more please visit my post: http://galiaalena.blogspot.co.nz/2013/01/blogging-awards-thank-you.html and find directions, as well as a list of other bloggers I’ve nominated.
Gxx
January 28th, 2013 | #
Happy Birthday Pia, what ever it is you chose to do celebrate I hope it has brought you much joy and contentment.
As for the juggling act. When had my first I was a full time photographer and experienced the same heart ache you describe, after several years of struggling to find the balance I followed my heart and made changes to my career to suit my families situation without completely letting go of my own dreams.
Your creativity and aspirations to propel forward in your career is not something you can simply set aside especially after the foundation you have built for yourself. But it is also not easy to set aside the overwhelming feeling of love your have for your child and the guilt of leaving them at times. There may be times that you need to let go of something temporarily in order to make the most of the precious time you have with your child, but that does not mean you need to let your own aspirations disappear.
Remember that you are teaching Laly that she too can contribute to society as a women as well as enjoy the amazing journey of parenthood.
Wishing you all the best in finding a balance that works for you.
January 28th, 2013 | #
Dearest Pia, welcome to the world of working Mothers. Mother guilt is a heavy burden to carry and one which I am told lasts a lifetime. My heart goes out to you but please know that your work and talent is such a gift to be shared and that by sharing these with others you are being true to yourself which in turn makes you a better Mother. Treat yourself with kindness through the stressful periods and Laly will reap the benefits. Know adn keep faith that your best will always be good enough whilst trying to find that illusive balance !!!! Wishing you peace , calm and kindness in the days to come.
January 29th, 2013 | #
Happy belated birthday! I will be 35 next week. 🙂
Crossing my fingers for your pozible pledge. I´m looking forward to holding this special book in my hands.
January 31st, 2013 | #
Do what you love! Take photos of your wonder-your beautiful daughter! Walk to your favorite spot in town or the city and bask in the moment of now! Treat yourself to a fabulous pastry with your favorite beverage and be happy, for all your blessings~
I would love to see what you created-it is difficult dance! You carry her with you, in your heart~ Happy Birthday!!!
February 1st, 2013 | #